so pick me, choose me, love me.

Saturday, June 30, 2007

Cause I got tagged

again. I'm doing this for the second time, just to humour Louisa. Aw aren't I sweet? Haha.

Rules of the game:
Each player of this game starts off with ten weird things or habits or little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tagbacks.

#1) Guess what. I just broke a nail! YES that means spending money and so that means new GAP bag!! Haha. I never knew where my mummy got the idea that breaking a nail means spending money, but heh. There's no way I'm complaining!:D

#2) I know I've said this before but I gotta say this again. I absolutely LURRRRRVE my bolster. Yes I lovelovelovelovelove.(:

#3) I have this terrible fear that one day I might just very well go blind.

#4) I don't know if I have mentioned this previously, but I took ballet lessons when I was young.

#5) I'm a pessimist, and I always think the worst of everything. Well, almost everything. Hee.

#6) I simply love KFC.

#7) I also love dory fish and salmon, but that's about all the seafood I eat. I'll have nothing to do with prawns, sotong, stingray, crabs, shellfish and what have you nots. Hm maybe except scallops. Those fake ones, haha. Oh and I don't eat durians.

#8) Up to date, I only found one person with almost the same eating habits as me. Marianne!(:

#9) I am most of the time hungry. But then, most people are. Haha!

#10) Okay last one. I think the VJ uniform is the nicest out of all.(:

Done. Oh and I shall be nice and give a bonus little known fact about myself.

#11) I'm feeling super tired and drowsy now, and I wanna sleep.

Betcha didn't know that. Haha! 'Kay BYE.

stuck in reverse
♥11:23 PM

Aren't we all the same. It is always easier when things are not happening to you. It is always easier to analyze other people, to understand why, under their circumstance, they do they things they do.

You know that some things are only logical - it comes across clear as day when you're not part of things, but sometimes you get too caught up in yourself to recognise the subtle hints, the clues to the main issue, to what a person is not saying, to the Unspoken, because humans are all built this way, and so we just don't simply spill our hearts out and bare it anyhow, anytime, for the world to see.

I have been to caught up in myself these past few days, and it isn't good. I keep trying to remember that the world doesn't only revolve around me, but I was never good at remembering. Nonetheless, I am trying, and I'll keep trying. I've been a horrible person lately, and I'm really sorry. Forgive me?

stuck in reverse
♥11:00 PM

Yay my medical check-up is finally out of the way. I wasn't expecting an eye check though, so I freaked out a little. There was this tray at the counter labeled LASIK and I was so afraid that they'll ask me to undergo lasik or sth, especially when the lady put my eyesight down as inadequate. Ha. I know I'm a 'lil paranoid when it comes to my eyes (or eyesight), but they say people go blind when myopia hit the thousands, and I'm really THIS close to loosing it. Right eye is already in the league, a thousand twenty five to be exact. Omg but I don't want to go blind. My personal nightmare. BUT ANYWAY, nothing came out of it and the lady didn't demand that I undergo Lasik, so everything is fine and dandy and I shall not worry too much abt it.

I finally did my shopping today too! And ohohoh. The GAP bag is so nice. And its so pretty. And its also 75 bucks, but soon it will be mine, I'll make sure of it. Hehheh. Dinner was good 'ol KFC, and it was awesome. Great chicken, great company. Highly entertaining, too. Hahaha. Gosh, Wei you're an extremely itchy guy. Haha!:D

Oh and just for archive's sake, Thursday was my last day of work, so I'm a free girl now! Haha. The mere knowing that I can now sleep till 9am is indeed therapeutic.

I'm beat. My 10 facts about myself will have to wait. I'm going NTU again tmr! Kay random. Night all.

stuck in reverse
♥12:35 AM

Thursday, June 28, 2007

My God, Miss Ong Wei Qing Cynthia, you're such an idiot. You're so full of yourself, but the world doesn't only revolve around you. I hope this has taught you a lesson, you pompous asshole.

I am humbled.

stuck in reverse
♥11:18 PM

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

This is the thing that really irks the hell out of me.

I wonder if you ever thought of me when you barged your way through between the both of us. I wondered if you ever felt guilty in your aggressive campaign. But then what would a little (or alot of) guilt mean when you so self-righteously and so steadfastly carried on your wooing in spite of it? But then again, who am I to stand in the way of your happiness.

But then again, why should I care, really. (Other than for the fact that I have to actually live with it.) Why should I find justification in giving in to you? Nothing would change, and at the end of the day, nobody really cares two hoots, except maybe me. The whole unfortunately stubborn issue has been stewing and stewing inside me and I'm so sick and tired and weighed down by all of this shit anyway.

You know what, this really feels like being with the guy with Grotesquely Acute Immature Behaviour again. Ha.

This whole thing is sounding too much like a relationship gone bad, haha. Therefore, I shall treat it like how I would if I'm jilted. I'll be happy about it. Just watch me.

stuck in reverse
♥4:09 PM

Monday, June 25, 2007

Hey Janice, if you're reading this, I just converted. I'm now officially a sucker for freebies. Haha!

stuck in reverse
♥4:25 PM

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Les Mis always touches me, and Eponine never fails to make me tear. The orchestra is majestic, and their voices beautiful, so beautiful.

And now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to.
Without a home, without a friend,
Without a face to say hello to.
And now the night is near,
Now I can make believe he's here.

Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping.
I think of him, and then I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping.
The city goes to bed,
And I can live inside my head.

On my own,
Pretending he's beside me.
All alone,
I walk with him till morning.
Without him,
I feel his arms around me,
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me.

In the rain,
The pavement shines like silver.
All the lights
Are misty in the river.
In the darkness,
The trees are full of starlight,
And all I see is him and me for ever and forever.

And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to him.
And although I know that he is blind,
Still I say,
There's a way for us.

I love him,
But when the night is over,
He is gone,
The river's just a river.
Without him,
The world around me changes.
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers.

I love him,
But every day I'm learning,
All my life,
I've only been pretending!
Without me,
His world will go on turning,
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known!

I love him...
I love him...
I love him...
But only on my own...

stuck in reverse
♥12:42 AM

Friday, June 22, 2007

I've been existing in a limbo ever since March, and me, I have long gotten stale. I simply don't live Life the way I used to. I don't smile the way I used to, I don't walk the way I used to, I don't sleep the way I used to, and I don't laugh the way I used to. I never wake up, stretch, then smile at the beauty of Mornings anymore. Maybe that's because Mornings are getting harsher, but then, I don't walk in late into the office and say hello to everyone I meet on the way, like how I used to. I don't strut down the underpass to the basement of Republic Plaza, thinking catty thoughts and feeling like I can conquer the world anymore.

I haven't been happy in a long, long, time.

So, this is what I'll do. Unhappiness spreads, and therefore I shall think happy thoughts. I'll sleep early, and I'll think Beautiful. I shall stop blaming myself for my grades, and I'll quit being embarrassed about it. For once, I'm going to believe that ABBCA1 is not that bad (in terms of my own standards for myself) after all. I'm not satisfied with it and I'm not happy about it, but I'm going to admit defeat and accept it anyway. I shall look towards university and I'll challenge my devils. And so, I'll attempt to join ntusb, and hope that I won't give them reason to laugh their asses off. I shall stop thinking that I'm never good enough for anything, and that I don't deserve what I have.

I'll stop being so harsh on myself, because it can't change anything. I'll remember that me not being harsh on myself does not mean that I'll forget.

I'll be sincere, and I'll hit the ground running.

Getting over things is often the most difficult, mainly because you have to admit, acknowledge and accept your own failure first. I fail, but I'm only human. And yes I'll stop telling myself that that is only excuse.

I can't help it, but if I have to be a pessimist, then by God, I'm gonna be a happy one.

stuck in reverse
♥8:09 PM

Thursday, June 21, 2007

If you say another stupid thing like, "Everyone on this train is going towards the east because we're on the train to Pasir Ris!! *Spongebob's laugh* " or "Why is it so cold today huh? Oh i know! Because it has been raining the whole day! *gigglegiggle*", I swear I'm gonna kill you.

stuck in reverse
♥11:23 AM

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

If mornings are going to stay this way, gentle, peaceful, lazy and beautiful, I might find myself abruptly quitting my job, just to enjoy mornings.

I still badly need some ME time, but June is almost over and gone, shopping left undone and university starting in less than 2 months time. To think I actually told myself sometime around March that I had all the time in the world to __________ (I honesty can't specifically remember what off-hand). And of course there's the issue of money, which, seeing that I managed to blow away almost 50 bucks in just an evening without shopping, I should be quite concerned about.

Oh, moo-lah, me moo-lah!

stuck in reverse
♥10:52 PM

This was today, holed up in the compactor room with hundreds of files.

But it was good, I was actually busy. Heh.

Okay, now for random photos.

I finally managed to take a shot of Wei's birthday present. Its quite nicely done, no? Ha I really am quite proud of myself.(:

Hokkien mee. My constant.

Heavy.

Morning after sdd'o6.

and finally,

BYE.

stuck in reverse
♥1:56 AM

Monday, June 18, 2007

My eyes are feeling real funny, and before they swell themselves shut, I shall stop watching korean dramas. Goodness, they're such tear jerkers. Crunchyroll is evil.

I believe the run to be less than 2km to Parkway, according to Wei. It seemed much further than that actually, but he would know best, I suppose. Its his house. *skeptical look* Ha alrights maybe I should just shut up and admit that I'm no longer where I was before. All I've got now are lungs of solid, non-expandable steel, feeble stamina, and zero endurance. And thighs that are screaming bloody murder. I suppose I wasn't too good to start off with, but I think I was considered respectable. Ah, one more thing to leave behind in TK (and VJ?).

But then, rain has never been more fun.(:

17th June, 7 times the love.
Your hands shelter me from the storm.

On a totally random note, I just realised today that I've always spelt weird wrongly. But not anymore! Haha.

Alrights I'm off to rescue my eyes. Good night.

stuck in reverse
♥11:37 PM

Friday, June 15, 2007

Friday, 15 June, 2007, 8.27am

It has been a long time since I've woken up like this, feeling so peaceful, so soothed, so lazy, and so in love with the world. There wasn't even a need to walk hurriedly in my heels to the mrt station and rush up the escalator within a minute or so for the train. Nopes. This morning was all leisure walk and strolls.

Okay maybe it had something to do with the fact that I'm also so late (by this time it was 8.58am, work starts at 9.) that the next train was due 4 minutes later (usually rush hour trains come every 3 minutes), but I digress.

Lovely rainy morning, I really, really, like.

On a random note, mornings usually start off so slow ( or so fast, depends on how you see it) that time usually goes by the minute.

On another random note, I really love Kembangan mrt station, because its so small and so accessible that it makes rushing for trains easy.

On yet another random note, my spelling really sucks. Heh.

-

Friday, 15 June, 2007, 1030pm

Work does this to you. It shortens your evening, and it makes you wish that there were more than 24 hours a day. It also makes days pass by so fast that you find yourself lost in them.

I think I badly need some ME time. My feet are feeling sore and dry and abused from all the fast walk every morning ( I only take three minutes to walk from the mrt station to republic plaza 2nd floor to take the lift -- serving even storeys only. going up. haha! -- up to the 50th level.) I want to pamper my feet and paint them the pretty colour I bought only two days ago and then rub moisturiser/lotion into them, not necessarily in that order. I want to read my book I want to go get my matriculation number and figure out the complicated NTU procedures and I want to book driving slots three days consecutively before my driving test and to do so I need my timetable which I think I can get upon receiving my matriculation number.

Oh, so many many things to do.

And of course, I need my daily night fix of you.

-

Friday, 15 June, 11.45pm

My feet feels good again! Oh and they're pretty too.(: I think I shall procrastinate in obtaining my matriculation number and pray that there will still be available slots on the 14th, 15th, and 16th of august. HOHO.

Alrights. Now for the phone. BYE! :D

stuck in reverse
♥11:48 PM

Game of Chance.

I wished I never chanced upon it. We're similar. Its scary.

Labels: Life's little quirks

stuck in reverse
♥1:36 AM

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Hey. I'm feeling better.

Eh you. I don't know you and I highly doubt you'll ever get to read this, but look here. She is my dearest and bravest friend, so you'd better not be callous or careless, or obtuse (although this always seem to be the case with guys. God I really hope it isn't NS.). And if you do, I swear I'll hurt you. Verry badly. *Bares fangs*

Some people look really good tanned and browned. Sigh. Me, I can stand under the sun the whole day and I'll never be tan, unless red is the new brown.

Art. What constitutes art and how much do you know of it?

I can never understand how people can join Music and make Music, (via voice or instrument) without living and breathing it. And so I can only wonder and marvel at people who manage to remove every trace of music and art from their lives and so completely, so much so that music and art become excesses, unwanted and unneeded.

Although I'm not good, I so miss making music, especially with the band.

stuck in reverse
♥3:17 PM

Shut up cyn cyn shut up shut up shut up shut up cyn you'd better shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up for goodness sake cyn just please freaking shut up.

I've decided to settle on Hysterical at least for now, the other alternative being Restless. Everything's wanting to be let out and I just wnt to ROAR to let it all out or shriek at the top of my lungs or jump around like Barney when he does his boy-oh-boy thing, except a 100 times continuosly. Hopefully driving in the evening will drive horrible thoughts away. Haha driving, drive, geddit? Hehhehheh someone slap me please please please pretty please with creme brulee on top. Oh yum. How's that for a t(h)reat, huh. ARGH.

I come in peace. I assure you that I mean no harm.

And no I do not own a bloody spaceship.

stuck in reverse
♥9:33 AM

Hi. I think the impact of events hit me slower than they do others. Have you ever had things go smoothly, so smoothly, such that it borders on unreality? Somehow, I'm anticipating, expecting, waiting for things to go wrong. Now that plans are thwarted and knowing me, I should be panicking, but I ain't. Hm. Funny.

I wonder if there are people who converse because they have to.

I find myself harbouring uncharitable thoughts these few days, with understandable, acceptable and perfectly reasonable reason, of course. Haha. But uncharitable thoughts are still uncharitable thoughts, and being the nice girl I am, I shall banish all uncharitable thoughts and think nice thoughts, although it is kinda impossibly impossible. Its hard okay! Very, terribly, difficult.

I yak alot and I appreciate quick wit, smart puns, sharp humour and especially good company, so the whole notion of Loner is completely above me. However I am acquainted with the many ways of the world (plus it reminds me of you and makes me miss you even more (if such a thing was possible)) and so I will accept and adapt, but I sincerely hope to God that I'll come out of this whole episode with my dignity, my sanity and my intelligence intact.

Omg I couldn't spell intelligence!! This is it man. I am becoming more and more stupid and its all your fault. GAH. (insert series of qian bian and rude faces) GRRRR.

stuck in reverse
♥12:27 AM

Monday, June 11, 2007

The Time Traveler's Wife is heartbreaking.

Suddenly, there is this need to know that you're here with me, that you're real and you're here. Suddenly, I'm in denial, in fear of what might not be. And suddenly, I'm missing you terribly, just so terribly.

Labels: Love, Reads

stuck in reverse
♥2:41 AM

Friday, June 08, 2007

♥

There's a song that's inside of my soul
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again
I'm awake in the infinite cold
But You sing to me over and over and over again

And then over and over and over again.

stuck in reverse
♥1:32 PM

Thursday, June 07, 2007

My new heels are ugly already. I think all the fast walking I do every morning is wearing my heels out. AHA.

I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon! I want to go shopping soon!

Oh yea. Shopping.(=(=(=(=(=(=(=(=(=

Oh and I'm back to blogging in the office. Teehee!

Driving later tonight, then dinner. Oooh I can't wait I can't wait! Sheesh if this goes on I'll definitely die in NTU.

Ah, but that's another day's concern. Bah. Two days is just too damn long.

stuck in reverse
♥2:14 PM

Friday, June 01, 2007

It has been done, finally. Hello, NTU.

stuck in reverse
♥9:30 PM

Greece.

Greece. A freaking waste. Ha. What a shame.

stuck in reverse
♥12:40 AM